Virginia WaltonYou have probably heard that you should have a mentor, a sponsor and an advocate to help advance your career. I saw a great way to describe these recently. A mentor talks to you, an advocate talks about you and a sponsor talks for you. What is lacking in this is a Champion.
Who got notes on the napkin in their lunches from mom? Some snack companies even make places on the packages now for such encouraging notes. Why do we stop doing this when we get older? The need for love and support does not stop when you turn 18 or graduate middle school.
A champion will advocate for you, but we are talking about more than that. You need that person who is going to encourage you, acknowledge your wounds, help you learn from your defeats and keep pushing you forward. Picture the coach in the corner of the ring! He offers guidance (“jap, dodge, again!), wraps up your hands, and wipes off the sweat and blood.
Afterall, some days in corporate America leave you feeling like you went three rounds in the ring. Maybe you came out the victor- you landed the big deal, impressed the board, found the solution, or cut expenses 10%. Maybe you came home beaten, you missed the deadline, you looked foolish in a meeting or you had to lay off staff due to missed budget targets.
First, know that you are not the only one to have the later kind of days. We have all been there. Musician Kenney Chesney has a song, The Woman with You, that talks about one of those days. The wife in this song used to dream from running the bank, but on this day, she was closing deals, fixing the copy machine and ends it with a ripped bag of groceries in her hands and all she wants is a hot bath. The husband is her champion. He sits on the porch swing and lets her just be with him. Maybe for you it is not a spouse, but a sibling or a close friend.
My first champion was my grandfather. He bragged on me like no bodies business. I’ll admit he did not always have his facts right, but he was proud. I was 23 when he died, just getting ready to move into my own house, had just moved into my first career step and now I had no one to brag on me. I was a little lost.
You would think my ex-husband would have filled that role when I was married. Sadly, he did not. He saw my success as a reminder that I did not ‘need’ him. I made more money; I already had a house and my mother had raised me with the value of never be dependent on a man. The sponsors and advocates I had at work helped fill this void.
If your Champion is your spouse, that person cannot fill the need when you are dealing with a relationship issue. So, feel free to have a few and recognize that your champions will serve different purposes and will change over time. Think about it, most of us do not still go to the same doctor we did when we were 5 years old. We have changed, our needs have changed so we need someone with different skills set to meet our needs. The point is you need a Champion like you need a doctor. It is part of your well-being tool kit.
If you are someone’s champion. Thank you! We need more of you. If you are not, be on the lookout for the opportunity to be one. You may just find you get a little something out of those experiences too. If you want to know what it is, try it out.